[Actually seeing Raphael seeming scared doesn't do anything to make Leo feel less panicky. The tightness under his plastron means he's struggling to keep his breathing even.]
Y-yeah, yeah, I'll- sorry. Sorry, Raph. [An actual apology isn't a great sign either. He can't take it back either. Not that the thought occurs to him yet. He's spiraling fairly quickly and isn't sure why.
He scrubs at his face, scrunching into himself as much as possible.
Leo is realizing very quickly, in this situation, he can't really do anything.
He's not Donnie, whose smart, or Mikey whose creative enough to think his way out of weird situations. Raph is strong enough that they probably would have been fine with just the punching. Leo just made the situation more complicated for Raph.
He's just the faceman.
He can't talk his way out of this.
He made this worse though, he needs to backpedal a little. He can make this better for the important one here.]
Your fear stink is way out of control, and there is no way for me to get out of range. [He tries for light-hearted teasing, but his voice is absolutely bland. He sounds close to tears and awkwardly coughs to try and cover it up.]
[ A quiet and sincere apology from Leo. Like, not even an ironic one. Or a sarcastic one. Or a jokey one.
Which like, it's not like Leo never apologizes for anything ever, everyone's had a crack at the ol' apology wallet. But it's not usually in moments like this? Specifically? Usually a Leo apology is an "after everything is over" phenomenon. It's not a good omen. There are no good omens.
If Leo is dying, Raph's gonna kill him. ]
I can't control the stink. You know I can't control the stink. [ He can't even really be a Mad Dog when Leo sounds... like such a Sad Dog. ]
Man. How come every time a mission sounds easy, it turns out it's actually insanely tough? Where's all the gimmes?
[ Should've just found a bank robbery or something. If he's even qualified to keep his brothers alive against robbers. ]
Sometimes I wish you could. I mean, ugh. This whole closet is going to stink soon. [That was about the worst attempt at lightening the mood he could make, but he's clinging to it a little desperately.
He presses his hand against his plastron, it curls into a tight fist as he tries to steady himself. His voice is shaky, nervous. He blinks a bit, cringing at a few tears escaping. He's trying for normalcy if anything.] Cause our luck sucks?
We've been to the Hidden City before, we should have had this on lock.
Watch the sass or I'll make it worse. [ No one is too mature or responsible for the brotherly instinct to be worse out of spite. Can he control it, no, will he use this closet time to learn just for that.... maybe.
Probably not. That would be a lot of energy to divert away from, let him check his notes, bone-deep dread and terror.
This should've been easy. Why isn't it easy? The only thing that went wrong was like, one person in a hallway they had to hide from, and for them that's wildly good. But now everything is terrible? And he can't do better if he doesn't figure out what he messed up, and if he can't do better he can't keep his brothers safe, and if he can't do that then what's even the point?
Raph really wishes he was the type of turtle who could hide out in his shell for a while. This is a whole catastrophe. Mostly for coping mechanisms.
Their luck does suck. Case in point: ]
-- did you hear that?
[ Debatable. It might just be Raph hearing it. A suspicious skittery giggle that he thinks surely could only come from horrific puppets. ]
I will not be silenced, Raph. [He tries to sound huffy to sell the joke, but its still not going anywhere.
He ends up just lifting up the edges of his mask to press the butt of his palm against his eyes. He is trying to just bring himself back to his normal baseline.
Why is he freaking out so hard? He shouldn't be. He really shouldn't. Even if he's just dead weight here, he needs his head together.
The question jars Leo out of his own thoughts.]
...No? What did you hear-? [He doesn't even try for banter, starting to sit up a little bit.]
[ The day Leo is silenced is a true day of disaster. Even a sad, scared-sounding Leo is better than a silent Leo.
His brothers just being themselves is the top-tier end goal, of course. Even when them being themselves is happening in a way that drives him up a wall.
They're gonna get murdered in a mystic closet and Leo isn't even gonna be able to crack jokes to cope about it, and Raph doesn't know how exactly it's his fault but it probably is. After all this is over maybe he will move on to blaming whatever weirdo hoarded all these artifacts in this dumb closet in the first place. ]
That! How did you not-- [ He's not hearing things. He's not. He can't be. Creepy laugh right there, clear as day. He snaps his head back to look up at the ceiling like there's gonna be something waiting to strike. ] That!! The creepy laugh!
[Leo's fear spiral is interrupted by confusion as he just stares at Raph. Leo ends up looking around, wondering if he's missing something.
All he really hears is the heavy silence in the hall outside and both of their breathing.]
What are you talking about? I'm not hearing anything.
[He tries to stand up, but ends up just losing his footing from the emotional exhaustion starting to set in. His shell clips into a shelf, sending a few things toppling down on them in the process.] Ugh- ugh, no!
[The giggling certainly seems to be getting louder from where those items had been, what a mystery! or merely a hallucination.
Leo unaware of the sounds, just scrubs at his face with his hands angrily.]
[ WHY MUST EVERYTHING HAPPEN SO MUCH ALL AT ONCE IN THIS CLOSET OF NIGHTMARES. Why can he not-- not just calm down?
It's never an easy A to B line to calmed down, when he gets like this, but Raph should still be able to remember the steps. It took so much work to learn. To make it a habit. It's like it's all just gone.
He does the cool thing and simply opts to stand very very still. If fight and flight are off the table, freeze will do just fine. Be a big brother. What do big brothers do. They take care of their little brothers. Sometimes they're the only one who can. ]
You-- you didn't. You- [ And a hitch because the laughing doesn't stop, it won't even let him talk, he's not crazy, why is she messing with them- Raph presses his hands to his head and tries to block out the sound. ] You're not. You're not. I just. Gimme a minute and I got you, okay?
[ Breathing is the big step. He remembered breathing is important. Maybe he'll work on that and then figure out where he stands re: confronting the fact that the laughing got louder over there versus trying to chew through the door like an actual trapped animal. ]
I am! Its kind of what I do, Raph! [The fear rolls over into frustration as he sucks in a breath. Then another. He is not feeling any calmer. Not even slightly.
He does go quiet at Raph's question. He clicks his teeth together, hunching into himself slightly. The bottles on the floor need to get picked up. Who knows what else is actually in them?
He awkwardly tries to crouch down again to try and collect the fallen bottles. He quickly discovers a few are broken when he grabs at glass. He reels back with a startled pained sound, biting the inside of his cheek as he closes his eyes. The anger is dissipating back into something else and Leo can't even quantify it. He's just shaking bodily next to Raph.]
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Y-yeah, yeah, I'll- sorry. Sorry, Raph. [An actual apology isn't a great sign either. He can't take it back either. Not that the thought occurs to him yet. He's spiraling fairly quickly and isn't sure why.
He scrubs at his face, scrunching into himself as much as possible.
Leo is realizing very quickly, in this situation, he can't really do anything.
He's not Donnie, whose smart, or Mikey whose creative enough to think his way out of weird situations. Raph is strong enough that they probably would have been fine with just the punching. Leo just made the situation more complicated for Raph.
He's just the faceman.
He can't talk his way out of this.
He made this worse though, he needs to backpedal a little. He can make this better for the important one here.]
Your fear stink is way out of control, and there is no way for me to get out of range. [He tries for light-hearted teasing, but his voice is absolutely bland. He sounds close to tears and awkwardly coughs to try and cover it up.]
no subject
Which like, it's not like Leo never apologizes for anything ever, everyone's had a crack at the ol' apology wallet. But it's not usually in moments like this? Specifically? Usually a Leo apology is an "after everything is over" phenomenon. It's not a good omen. There are no good omens.
If Leo is dying, Raph's gonna kill him. ]
I can't control the stink. You know I can't control the stink. [ He can't even really be a Mad Dog when Leo sounds... like such a Sad Dog. ]
Man. How come every time a mission sounds easy, it turns out it's actually insanely tough? Where's all the gimmes?
[ Should've just found a bank robbery or something. If he's even qualified to keep his brothers alive against robbers. ]
no subject
He presses his hand against his plastron, it curls into a tight fist as he tries to steady himself. His voice is shaky, nervous. He blinks a bit, cringing at a few tears escaping. He's trying for normalcy if anything.] Cause our luck sucks?
We've been to the Hidden City before, we should have had this on lock.
no subject
Probably not. That would be a lot of energy to divert away from, let him check his notes, bone-deep dread and terror.
This should've been easy. Why isn't it easy? The only thing that went wrong was like, one person in a hallway they had to hide from, and for them that's wildly good. But now everything is terrible? And he can't do better if he doesn't figure out what he messed up, and if he can't do better he can't keep his brothers safe, and if he can't do that then what's even the point?
Raph really wishes he was the type of turtle who could hide out in his shell for a while. This is a whole catastrophe. Mostly for coping mechanisms.
Their luck does suck. Case in point: ]
-- did you hear that?
[ Debatable. It might just be Raph hearing it. A suspicious skittery giggle that he thinks surely could only come from horrific puppets. ]
no subject
He ends up just lifting up the edges of his mask to press the butt of his palm against his eyes. He is trying to just bring himself back to his normal baseline.
Why is he freaking out so hard? He shouldn't be. He really shouldn't. Even if he's just dead weight here, he needs his head together.
The question jars Leo out of his own thoughts.]
...No? What did you hear-? [He doesn't even try for banter, starting to sit up a little bit.]
no subject
His brothers just being themselves is the top-tier end goal, of course. Even when them being themselves is happening in a way that drives him up a wall.
They're gonna get murdered in a mystic closet and Leo isn't even gonna be able to crack jokes to cope about it, and Raph doesn't know how exactly it's his fault but it probably is. After all this is over maybe he will move on to blaming whatever weirdo hoarded all these artifacts in this dumb closet in the first place. ]
That! How did you not-- [ He's not hearing things. He's not. He can't be. Creepy laugh right there, clear as day. He snaps his head back to look up at the ceiling like there's gonna be something waiting to strike. ] That!! The creepy laugh!
no subject
All he really hears is the heavy silence in the hall outside and both of their breathing.]
What are you talking about? I'm not hearing anything.
[He tries to stand up, but ends up just losing his footing from the emotional exhaustion starting to set in. His shell clips into a shelf, sending a few things toppling down on them in the process.] Ugh- ugh, no!
[The giggling certainly seems to be getting louder from where those items had been, what a mystery!
or merely a hallucination.Leo unaware of the sounds, just scrubs at his face with his hands angrily.]
Why am I making everything worse?!
no subject
It's never an easy A to B line to calmed down, when he gets like this, but Raph should still be able to remember the steps. It took so much work to learn. To make it a habit. It's like it's all just gone.
He does the cool thing and simply opts to stand very very still. If fight and flight are off the table, freeze will do just fine. Be a big brother. What do big brothers do. They take care of their little brothers. Sometimes they're the only one who can. ]
You-- you didn't. You- [ And a hitch because the laughing doesn't stop, it won't even let him talk, he's not crazy, why is she messing with them- Raph presses his hands to his head and tries to block out the sound. ] You're not. You're not. I just. Gimme a minute and I got you, okay?
[ Breathing is the big step. He remembered breathing is important. Maybe he'll work on that and then figure out where he stands re: confronting the fact that the laughing got louder over there versus trying to chew through the door like an actual trapped animal. ]
no subject
He does go quiet at Raph's question. He clicks his teeth together, hunching into himself slightly. The bottles on the floor need to get picked up. Who knows what else is actually in them?
He awkwardly tries to crouch down again to try and collect the fallen bottles. He quickly discovers a few are broken when he grabs at glass. He reels back with a startled pained sound, biting the inside of his cheek as he closes his eyes. The anger is dissipating back into something else and Leo can't even quantify it. He's just shaking bodily next to Raph.]